Courage and Fear
The thing I’ve learned the last couple of days is that life is full of assumptions.
You just never know what will happen.
Here’s what happened to me. A couple of times this week I needed to say certain things to someone that were very difficult for me. I have a low threshold for conflict (and any type of pain for that matter.) What I needed to say I thought might have caused a conflict or caused the other person to not like me very much. And I was very uneasy.
But I moved past my fear and said them anyway.
It took a lot of courage.
And you know what happened? They didn’t mind. There was no conflict. In fact it was just the opposite. It was a beautiful conversation. Both times. And this was with two different people.
It gave me confidence that I could look fear in the face and say, ‘You’re false!’
That’s what fear stands for, you know: False Evidence Appearing Real (F.E.A.R.) 🙂
No matter how strong we feel it, we must believe that there’s a possibility that whatever bad thing we think might happen, won’t happen. We must question our assumptions.
And it’s all assumptions. We absolutely don’t know the future.
The feeling of fear is real, but it could be based on a false assumption. So we need courage to prove it wrong.
Step aside fear. I’m moving forward.
A Good Brainstorm
Well, it’s the 4th, and a Monday, so I’m just guessing it’s most people’s Day 1 for the new year.
And that’s just fine.
You know, every day can be a Day 1. You can start new, fresh, and perfect every day. You choose.
That doesn’t mean you should keep messing up every day, it just means you can get back up as fast as you fall down. So, whatever happens, however you feel about yourself because of what you have or haven’t done, you can always be perfect and start over on Day 1.
And that’s today.
So let’s get started.
It’s Day 1. What is your perfect day going to be like?
Make it so.
Motivated? (to learn)
Have you started yet?
Your new workout routine, diet, or habits?
Or are you going to wait until Monday?
Monday is always a good day to start. We’re still kind of in holiday mode, right?
But are you just procrastinating?
Why didn’t you start last week? Or when you actually thought it was a good idea. Dates shouldn’t matter so much. But the one we had yesterday sure seems to attract a lot of attention.
But if the calendar motivates you to make a positive change, then that’s good. Use whatever tactics possible. Motivation is a slippery thing.
Getting into new habits requires some smart effort. You need some strategy and an approach that is different than what you think should work.
One of the best books on habits that I’ve read lately (or listened to) is Atomic Habits by James Clear. I highly recommend learning what James learned from his experience recovering from a brain injury and his relentless study of habits and change. It’s a good book, with inspiring stories and tactical strategies.
When you learn stuff, you’re smarter. You’ll know how things work.
And there are always things working that you don’t know about.
Learning spawns change.
Let’s try this again.
Spinning around the sun.
That’s what we’re celebrating. Someone at some time decided that starting from now, let’s keep track of each rotation of the earth on its axis and its rotation around the sun. And we’ll call it January 1st.
So, we made it around again, and we’re going to try to make it around another time.
Okay, so maybe it didn’t happen exactly like that, and I’m sure I could find out how it did happen by looking it up in Wikipedia, but that’s not the point.
The point is that sometimes it’s good or interesting to look at our situation from a different perspective, or higher level. We should ask, ‘why’ more often. Or, what does this mean?
This last year, I think it’s kind of funny that people are grouping all the horrible things that happened into the arbitrary category of the year 2020. And now that we’re in 2021, things will be different. (Or we hope they will.)
But we’re moving in a circle. It’s one continuous round. So things will happen as they happen based on choices and circumstances that occur. We will just categorize them into years because that’s how our finite mind can keep track of things linearly.
I’m going to try and get better.
Better at improving my choices and therefore my situation and happiness.
Because I believe that can happen regardless of what is happening externally around me.
The question I ask myself a lot during vacation or holidays is probably pretty normal for a lot of people. But if you think about it a little more deeply, with the kind of deep questioning and meaning that I mentioned earlier, it is the question of eternity that will generate your own improvement and determine the outcome of your entire life:
“What should I do next?”
Think about it.
Let’s all try to have good answers so we can have a happy new year.
We made it around!
I’m going to get better, promise.
Here’s my plan:
Goal #1: post every day.
Goal #2: post something meaningful sometimes.
Goal #3: Post something meaningful almost every day.
I’m still working on Goal #1.
For how long?
Until Goal #2 starts to happen. (It may have already started, but I’m not counting it.)
Eventually Goal #3 will happen.
Probably when I get fed up with posting useless stuff. Or bored with it.
For now, I’m still excited accomplishing Goal #1. It’s a struggle or effort every day. As soon as it becomes effortless is when I get working on the next goals.
I like the freedom of posting garbage.
Hey, it’s my site. I can.
You don’t have to read or listen to any of it. (In fact, it’s probably not worth it yet.)
(Except for the occasional interesting post.)
I know there are other holidays around this time, and I really hope people enjoy all their different holiday traditions and celebrations.
It’s okay to say ‘Happy Holidays’ during this time to people because you don’t know exactly what they celebrate.
But today, you can say Merry Christmas, because that’s the holiday today. Even if you don’t celebrate it for religious reasons, it is a national holiday.
Christmas has an interesting history, with all kinds of changes and influences over the years, but I’d just like to recognize the original reason:
that a virgin gave birth to a child per some specific prophecies written in ancient texts. And even though that seems fantastic, the child grew and did some other things that are even more fantastic. And even though the religious sects and government at the time rejected his claim, the message of who he was, which matched prophecies in ancient writings thousands of years earlier, continued to spread throughout the world. And now, a couple thousand years later, most of the world continues to believe in this message, that something divine occurred on a silent night in a no-name town called Bethlehem.
I believe it too.
And it matters.
Use Your Words
Words are always important.
There are so many to choose from.
And when you put them in a certain order, they create meaning, a message, or a feeling that can affect another person significantly, either positively or negatively.
That’s why writing is so important. And learning to write well is a valuable skill.
We are a text based generation. So much communication is by text. And because we can remove ourselves from the words, they can be quite damaging. They can contain less feeling, compassion, and human connection, which ultimately can cause strife and conflict.
For the peace of humanity, let’s become better writers.
It is possible to use a better choice of words in the right order to convey feeling, connection, and compassion.
Thank you so much for reading this. I really appreciate it.
(See, that wasn’t so hard.)
Events to Remember
Christmas is coming…
And also a wedding…
So, many things to do, but it’s all about joy.
Joy in remembering and celebrating an event that happened a long time ago, and one that will happen soon, and will be remembered for a long time after.
Joyful events are important to have and remember.
We should have more of them.